Books read 2010-2011

After a week or so hiatus, I'm finally back at the computer. Perhaps it's the 94 degree weather. Perhaps its Cavan's two-hour-and-counting nap. Perhaps its the fact that I can no longer bend over or walk comfortably, therefore sedentary activities are much more appealing. But regardless, I'm back, and it feels good to write.

Many timely topics have come and gone over my brief break from blogging. I could revisit my two weeks living as an extreme hoarder. (Actually, we just cleaned the carpets and painted the bedrooms, so everything, I mean every piece of crap we had stored in our rooms and closets, was living in the hallway, the bathroom, the living room and even our cars. Yes, we turned our cars into storage units. That is a sure sign of hoarding, right!?)

I could go into detail (complain) about the uncomfortable reality of month nine of pregnancy. (Yesterday, I could not even fit into my maternity swimsuit from Cavan's pregnancy and had to resort to wearing Hubby's swim trunks and a T-shirt. Apparently my ass is now as bigger than my husband's considering I didn't even need to tie the drawstring.)

But, since it is the summer, how about discussing my summer reading list.

Last year, I read 29 new books (not counting books that I re-read for teaching purposes like Catcher in the Rye, Lord of the Flies, etc.) Here is the list. One day I intend to write a little blurb about each with recommendations and/or critiques, but for now, a starring system is all I can muster.

* I wish I hadn't wasted my time (no entertainment or literary merit)

** Not great, wouldn't recommend, but I'm not wishing for those hours back

*** Good and/or beach-read. Not exactly a literary masterpiece, but entertaining and/or interesting for the time it took to read.

**** Highly recommend! Please read so we can talk about it.

***** One of the best I have read in a long time.

Adult Contemporary

• City of Thieves by David Benioff ****
• Black Swan Green by David Mitchell *
• Bad Monkeys by Matt Ruff **
• Don’t Let’s Go to the Dogs Tonight: An African Childhood by Alexandra Fuller ****
• Sarah’s Key by Tatiana de Rosnay ***
• Little Bee by Chris Cleave ****
• The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo by Stieg Larson ****
• Ella Minnow Pea by Mark Dunn ****
• Bel Canto by Anne Pachett *****
• A Thousand Splendid Suns by Khaled Hosseni ****
• Mudbound by Hillary Jordan ****
• Water for Elephants by Sara Gruen ****
• The Glass Castle by Jeanette Walls*****
• Lucky by Alice Sebold ****
• The Good Thief by Hannah Tinti ***
• The Life of Pi by Yann Martel **** 
• Chelsea Chelsea, Bang Bang by Chelsea Handler****
• The Bluest Eye by Toni Morrison*** (very literary, but a chore to read)
• The Crucible by Arthur Miller****

Young Adult (most of these I read for high school student recommendations. BUT, I absolutely recommend the 4-stars to adult readers).

• Paper Towns by John Green***
• The Graveyard Book by Neil Gaiman***
• How to Build a House by Dana Reinhardt***
• Split by Swati Avasthi*** (good for boys)
• Rules by Cynthia Lord***
• The London Eye Mystery by Siobhan Dowd ***
• The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian by Sherman Alexie***
• Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins****
• Catching Fire by Suzanne Collins****
• Mockingjay by Suzanne Collins****

Read so far in 2011. 

• The Art of Racing in the Rain by Garth Stein****
• The Magicians by Lev Grossman***
• Room by Emma Donahue****
• The Five People You Meet in Heaven by Mitch Albom****
• The Road by Cormac McCarthy****
• Funny in Farsi by Faroozeh Dumas***
• Autobiography of a Face by Lucy Grealy***

As you can see, I am a bit behind on my reading quota this year. Here's what I have lined up for the summer. We'll see if I can get through the list, considering we are already a week into July.

• Truth and Beauty by Ann Pachett
• Unaccustomed Earth by Jhumpa Lahiri
• The Grapes of Wrath by John Steinbeck (yes, I'm an English teacher, and no I have not yet read this book. It's about time!)
• Let the Great World Spin by Colum McCann
• The Help by Katherine Sockett 

I'll try to post mini-reviews as I go through the list. That's a lofty aspiration considering I'll have a newborn in a few weeks, but it's good to have a goal, right?!

RemebeRED: The first time I peed my pants after pregnancy

This post was written for RemembeRED. The prompt: Fill in the blank. The first time I __________ after __________. (PS: This post contains TMI! Read at your own risk!) 

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The first time I peed my pants after pregnancy, a flood of disturbing thoughts drowned my brain as the gush soaked my shorts. 1. It's finally happened—I've turned into my mom. 2. Incontinence at 30—definitely not sexy (thank god I'm married). 3. Am I really going to have to resort to wearing panty liners or maxi-pads? Gross. 4. So this is why doctors and advice columnists recommend Kegels. 5. Now I'm gonna have to carry two changes of clothes in the diaper bag: one for the baby and one for me. 6. Thank god I was at home and not teaching a class! 7. Regardless, I'm mortified and will never tell anyone about this.

But pregnancy and child rearing changes you in more ways than you can prepare for—some for the good and many for the gory. If bodily functions freak you out, don't get pregnant (or don't knock up your wife), because sexy secretions will inevitably be replace by rapid-fire TMI incidents—that don't subside after the mess (miracle) that is vaginal childbirth. If you and your husband want to maintain that immaculately pure relationship based on intelligence and sex-appeal—a.k.a. you have not farted in front of each other or discussed the size or consistency of your own poop—I warn you now, say goodbye to that lifestyle the minute your Clear Blue Easy comes back positive. I guarantee you will become less self-conscious about all secretions. After the marching band that is the delivery-room staff parade around your wide-open, bleeding groin, you will care less about the nuisance of everyday bodily mishaps. But acceptance doesn't have to mean resignation.

I whole-heartedly believe in the miracle of life and the wonder that is pro-creation. But after two pregnancies, I am not one that finds swollen ankles and varicose veins attractive, let alone anything that can be describe by the words mucous or discharge (and hearing the two together is never a sign of a fun time). Despite the supreme joy of bring a child into this world, the side effects are less-than-pleasant. Though I have yet to experience the boobs that have stretched into saggy sacks like salt-water taffy on a hot day, my second baby has yet to be delivered and I'm sure I can't avoid the inevitable after another year of breast feeding. But isn't that always the case? The higher the jump the harder the fall. The harder the work, the higher the accomplishment. I would never trade my children for rock-hard boobies, but should I just give up and submit to losing my facilities every time my Allegra wears off? I think not. I will never resign to plastic-coated panties, thank you very much. So while I can accept the fact that my body has gone from model to mom (just go with the alliteration and don't infer any unintended conceit), I do not have to go gently into that good night.

Mommy's tired and my brain is broken

Mommy's tired. Pregnancy is wearing me out—thank god for spring break but I wish it was another week long. I am definitely looking forward to the end of the school year, and being a SAHM is sounding more lovely by the minute.

My brain is broken. I was organizing my 17,000 photos on my new iMac this week, and the upgraded iPhoto includes facial recognition. But you have to confirm and/or label a lot of the photos initially before the software works consistently. And I have lost the ability to recall names. Of people I know well enough to have photos of them. A serious case of baby brain.

Welp, hope you enjoyed this riveting post, but that's all my limited attention span can focus on today.

Welcome second trimester (it's about time you got here!)

Most women hail the onset of the second trimester because it marks the end of morning sickness and begins the golden weeks of pregnancy. Food tastes good again (largely because you are not experiencing the flavors going both down and up), you can stay awake for several hours without wanting to trade valuable organs or your life savings for a 20-minute nap, and ambition to “do things” emerges due to your sudden energy surge. While I am in my 23^rd week of pregnancy, and therefore, about 10 weeks into my second trimester, I feel as my golden moments have just arrived (and am scared they will be fleeting).

Let’s backtrack. With Cavan, I had morning sickness, but at week 13 on the dot, it dissipated. I remember the moment as if it was yesterday. One day I’m lying in bed in nauseous agony, and the next day I asked Hubby to take me to McDonalds (for my first real food in three months. Believe it or not, a human can live on crackers and bananas, but it is not a pleasant experience). We went through the drive-thru and ate in the parking lot. The Big Mac, large Dr. Pepper and fries were miracle drugs, and upon digestion, I was a new woman.

The rest of my pregnancy was easy, if not downright pleasurable. I relished in the new experience of growing my very own baby. Even thought the first flutters of kicks turned into jabs on my bladder, each was treasured. And how cute is that “popped” belly button. All the aches and pains and discomforts that I had been warned about from other women—gosh, what complainers. My feet swelled a little, but no big deal. Sure I had to pee all the time, but that was more of a nuisance than a discomfort. And why did other moms moan about heartburn? I felt great and was truly blessed with a perfect pregnancy experience until labor arrived. And 25 hours later, Cavan was finally born, but that is another story for another day.

But with this baby, the gestation has really taken its toll. SIXTEEN grueling weeks of morning sickness—the puking-multiple-times-a-day kind. My sweet Cavan would hear me wretching and come and pet me on the back while my head was in the toilet. And oh the heartburn, from the onset. So agonizing that I have to take Zantac both morning and night to keep it, just barely, under control. Not to mention paralyzing sciatica spasms, which thank goodness have been eased by visits to a pregnancy-trained chiropractor. And arriving home from work with just enough energy to lift Cavan into bed with me, turn on Wonder Pets and pass out until Hubby got home to take over toddler duty. And speaking of Hubby, I know he was ready to castrate himself with a kitchen knife to avoid knocking me up again. Apparently, my mood swung a bit toward the cranky side, with Hubby as the recipient. But I’m not intending to bitch (nor be one). Really I’m not. I’m intending to rejoice because this week I have emerged from the fog!

Maybe it was the fact that I wore to school today sneakers and jeans instead of work clothes, but I noticed a little bounce, a little pep, a little spring to my step. Maybe it is the onset of spring, but I’m feeling chipper and optimistic again enjoying the moments of my day rather than praying for night to arrive so I could finally get back in bed.  Whatever the reason, I’m going to live it up, because third trimester begins in less than a month, so my window of comfort is already closing, and come August, check Ebay—there is a strong likelihood that I’ll be auctioning one of my lungs for a couple hours of shut-eye.

New yummy!

Pregnancy and Lent (yes, the Catholic thing) have brought about a new discovery—one of my new favorite foods.

I go to the salad bar in the school cafeteria every day for lunch to get my daily dose of multi-colored veggies since dinners in my household are usually monopolized by meat. But, salads are generally not-so-filling, especially for a preggo belly, so I also usually stock it with a thick layer of lightly breaded chicken. BUT, no-meat-Fridays in Lent forced my hand last week—the only protein option was plain tofu. Well, what the hell, I figured I could cover it with enough ranch dressing to choke it down. (I have never, ever been a fan of tofu, despite how uber-chic I would look enjoying this moist and spongy vegan delicacy. By the way, since I'm already writing in a parenthetical, I hate the word moist. Unless you are describing a cake, moist almost always refers to something you don't want to touch.)

I'll congratulate my hormones for blessing me with my new yummy discovery. I'm now hooked on tofu, which has to be the strangest food craving I've ever heard of. With Cavan I was obsessed with doughnuts—the chocolate-covered, cream-filled kind—which may have been responsible for my 42-pound weight gain. But happily, my crazy fetus has chosen a healthy delight for to satisfy my urgent indulgences. Can anyone out there relate??